Jen and Brian and I took a trip to Napa this weekend, my Christmas present from them. As you can see from the picture, it was a gorgeous, sunny day. We started off with a picnic lunch, took a winetasting class at Copia, and then did tastings at 4 different wineries. The day ended with dinner in Sausalito, at a restaurant Jen thought she had visited before for brunch. It turned out she'd never been there, but it was outstanding anyway. It was a perfect day.

gems

I've been reading research papers all week, and here are some gems:

One of Steven Spielberg's most touching movies was called "Chandler's List."

The Beatles started to gain more fame and stage presents.

Jackie Robinson started to work for a company called Chock Full O' Nuts (only she had forgotten the "h" in "chock" and written it in above)

I'm sure by the end of the week there will be a few more. :)

nightmare

I had a dream last night that I was applying for a job as a pharmaceutical rep., and during my interview in the airport (?), I realized that my resume was unfinished. Actually, it was worse than unfinished...there was rambling and cursing about the interviewer at the bottom of my resume, and some jibberish about how I never wanted to work for corporate America. I tried to laugh it off, but at the end of the interview the interviewer just sighed, walked away, and took my suitcase with her.

Although I am an unashamed TV junkie, Saturdays for me almost always include This American Life, The Splendid Table, and if there is a lot of cleaning to do, Speaking of Faith. Since I was in the O.C. last weekend I listened to last weekend's This American Life episode on television.

Television has been a topic of conversation lately among my friends, and whether you love or hate television, this show had a lot to say. I have to say I never thought that I would hear David Rakoff discuss shows like My Super Sweet Sixteen and The Real Housewives of Orange County, but it was good. There's also a good Sarah Vowell article included in the episode, where she gives a nod to the Simpsons' Thanksgiving episode. Check it out.

the creation

Today was my birthday, and overall a very good day. I didn't have my usual middle school meeting this morning, so I slept in. My kids gave me a great gift, and a beautiful lily plant. Eventually I started being allergic to the plant so it had to go, but the thought was nice.

Right now I'm in the middle of creating a jello dish for my party tomorrow night. That's right, jello. John had the fabulous idea to have a jello potluck, and I'm having a great time being creative with it. My plan is that I'm making 2 different kinds of jello, molding it in muffin tins, and adding "surprise" things inside. Each one will be different. And, the best part is that I'll add cool whip to keep the ingredients secret, just like the lady at the church potluck. I'm thinking about adding meat to one as a prize--like whoever gets that one is the big winner...I'm not sure if I'll go through with it.

Anyway, that's 28--jello. hoorah!

Chuck Norris on Grammar

My kids have been doing group presentations this week on some aspect of subject/verb agreement. For the most part they have been pretty nondescript. Yesterday though was an exception. One group managed to skillfully integrate Chuck Norris into their presentation.

One of the requirements of the project was to include a visual aid, and this group chose to make a video. It was outstanding. They set up a scenario where an author (Mr. Lasagna) was bringing in a book to a publisher. When he walks up he says "I wrote a book," and for no reason that I can figure out he starts dancing to this Romanian dance song...a really good song actually. Then, he pitches the book. The "publishers" look at it and tell him that if there are any grammar errors, they won't publish it. Otherwise, they will. They read a section about the hero beating up Chuck Norris, including some sweet fight moves. Unfortunately, the subjects and verbs don't agree, and so it's rejected.

The "author" takes it back, rewrites the book (1000 pages in about 1 minute), and the "publishers" reread it. Miraculously the grammar errors are changed,and they will now publish the book. There is more dancing. I'm not sure if this comes across as funny in a blog, but it was Hilarious in class.

Oui!

This weekend I'm in Irvine, visiting Jas and Amanda. Actually, I'm posting right now from their living room. The first thing I have to say is this: I adore their Wii. Actually, I adore them more. The Wii is awesome though, and tennis is my game. I created a sweet Mii (a Nintendo version of myself), and she's got skills at tennis--500 some skill points, or whatever they're called.

Events galore have been the agenda this weekend. Yesterday we saw the Eifman Ballet's production of "The Seagull." It was stunning. I've seen a few ballets in the past few years, but this one was outstanding.

Then last night we saw Jason's show "Sunday in the Park with George." It wasn't specifically all Jason's, but it was his last show here. We celebrated by playing more Wii.

Amanda just asked me to include that we went to a fabulous paper store and she got kick-ass file folders that look like Paris. They're pretty sweet and Kitty loves them. (His real name is Cheeto, but I like Kitty better).

Today is shoe shopping at Cole Haan (whoo-hoo!!!), and then birthday martinis at Gulf Stream. I love shoes. And birthdays. And Manda and Jason. And Wii. But not in that order.

Happy Birthday, Donna!

Today

I've been trying to figure out what to say about today, but Billy Collins, former poet laureate of the US, has done it for me with his poem "Today."

If ever there were a spring day so perfect,
so uplifted by a warm intermittent breeze

that it made you want to throw
open all the windows in the house

and unlatch the door to the canary's cage,
indeed, rip the little door from its jamb,

a day when the cool brick paths
and the garden bursting with peonies

seemed so etched in sunlight
that you felt like taking

a hammer to the glass paperweight
on the living room end table,

releasing the inhabitants
from their snow-covered cottage

so they could walk out,
holding hands and squinting

into this larger dome of blue and white,
well, today is just that kind of day.

void

This may be a boring post, but that's the good thing about a blog-you don't have to read it. Or, you can read it and then tell your friends how boring it was. Or just think that to yourself, or maybe say it out loud. You choose.

The past few weeks have been weird. I've been thinking a lot about leaving, and that's been difficult, especially since it's totally my choice. I've also been awful at school. I just dread going, and even thinking about tomorrow morning makes me count the hours before I have to go there again. So much patience required right now...waiting for the school year to be over, and now waiting to know if my nephew has Down's Syndrome. It just seems like parents as young as my brother and sister-in-law shouldn't have to deal with something like that.

I've also been thinking a lot about future jobs. I've sort of been going into the move with the attitude that I likely won't get a job I love, so one that is okay will have to do. In fact, that's sort of how everything has felt lately. A totally selfish attitude, particularly when things like a new job are brought about by my decisions, but hey. What is a blog if not self-absorbed?

So I came home one day this week to find an envelope from my college. They're changing how they counsel people about career searching, so they're getting rid of all the paper files, including the mounds of paper required for education majors. So I got mine, and reading it was a mistake in the midst of future uncertainty. I'm not sure how much professors exaggerate when they write letters of recommendation, but it was totally depressing to read about how high their expectations of me were. Inadequate is too small a word for how I feel about the actual accomplishments compared to the predictions.

Some ass in the workout room today added to feeling like I've accomplished nothing. In the gym at my apartment there are two TVs. I had one on MTV, and this kind of young-ish, lawyer-looking guy asked me if I was watching it. I said yes, and told him he could turn on the other one if he wanted, it wouldn't bother me. He said "Oh, I think it might distract you." I thought that was kind of weird, but I let it go.

So he turned on CSPAN. People really watch CSPAN? And he wasn't even old, crotchety, or anything...so whatever. There was an author talking about his book on the current administration. I flipped my attention back and forth between CSPAN and True Life: I'm in a Biracial Relationship. The guy interrupted me a few more times, to ask when the workout room opens (I have no idea, I just started working out this week), and something about how the bike works (again, no idea). Then, at the end, as he walked out he said "So, was CSPAN better than you thought it would be?" What an ass. I wanted to say "I can watch CSPAN too, bitch." I didn't. But maybe I should have. And he was totally watching MTV too. Jerk.

So there. A boring post? Perhaps. You didn't have to read it. But now you did and you can go tell your friends how boring it was. Don't forget to mention the CSPAN guy, and how I'm totally smart enough to watch CSPAN, I just don't choose to sometimes.

More on MSP

The trip to Minneapolis was great. You can see that Angela is pregnant if you check out her blog. It was fun to see that. And their cat was weird. It loved me, but it insisted on licking my fingers and eventually chewing on my fingernails. Some sort of strange grooming thing I suppose.

We did many fun activities. Friday night we rented The Black Dahlia, a slightly confusing movie. I kept waiting for the ScoobyDoo moment when it was all explained. Saturday we went to Ikea* for fun, and I tried to convince Angela that the new baby should have a stuffed rat. Saturday night was baked potato pizza at Pizza Luce, and Sunday we had dinner with a bunch of Dordt people. Sunday night we went to a lecture by Nicholas Wolterstorff on the love of God and the desire for learning. It was really good. People did ask asinine questions, but I guess that's to be expected in a public forum. Also to be expected at a Midwestern church function? Yummy bars.

The picture is from the new Guthrie Theater. We're standing outside the endless bridge, which Ryan insisted was a skyway during the icy walk to the theater.

Oh, and yes, CA people, it was cold. You may not be able to tell it from the picture, but it was fuh-reezing. And windy. One lesson learned--cats are good for warmth, if you can get them to quit licking your hands.

*Ryan may not have initially thought Ikea was among the fun activities, but he was a great sport. And we have similar shopping habits, so that's a good thing.

MSP

I keep wanting to post about my trip to Minneapolis, but I don't have the time. One highlight--learning new vocabulary. My favorites:

baby wearing
kangaroo care

Both real things, I promise.

After a last minute decision Wed. night, I'm writing to ya'll from the heartland, more specifically Ang and Ryan's guest bedroom. Coming home to old friends is amazing. Ang and Ryan are great, their house is beautiful, and their cat adores me. He literally licked my fingers at least 5 or 6 times today. And sprawled out on my lap while we watched The Black Dahlia. I liked the style, but found it very hard to follow. I really wanted a Scooby Doo moment at the end where everything was explained, preferably with flashbacks.

I shall have to capture a photo of the cat tomorrow, and pregnant Ang--they're both adorable!

Decades Day

Today was decades day at school. As a 7th grade homeroom teacher, I was assigned the 1970's. I think I did pretty well with it. The shopping was a lot of fun, especially since it was half price night at Goodwill.

I love the glasses, and I attempted the wing-like Farrah Fawcett hair. It didn't totally work, but the outfit was killer. The orange top is sort of a caftan, over these homemade green printed pants. I thought it would just be a dress up outfit, but I do really like it and may just wear it out.

I'm pretty sure that at some point in college, maybe in an expository writing class, I was asked to read Into the Wild, by Jon Krakauer. The proof of this is that the book is on the shelf in my living room as I write, though I'm not sure I ever cracked the cover. In fact, I have no idea what it's about, which makes me sure I've never opened it. Oops.

As a teacher I'm annoyed at myself, as a student I know that reading a book just because you're assigned to doesn't always work. My book reading strategy as an adult is that if it doesn't catch me in the first few pages, I don't continue reading. Actually, I don't even take it home from the library if I'm not interested in the first few pages. There are too many good books to read to waste time slogging through something I'm not interested in. Not to say all the good books are easy, as Anna Karenina can attest to, but sometimes I just have to pick up a book when I'm ready to read it. My library list would show that sometimes I check out a book 2-3 times before I actually read it.

So though I've left the first Jon Krakauer book on the shelf for probably 6 or 7 years now, a few others of his have kept me up reading late into the night. First I read Under the Banner of Heaven with a friend's book group. I think I've written about it before on the blog, probably mentioning how closely the actual story resembles a South Park episode.

Lately though I've been drawn in by Into Thin Air. Blame it on the Discovery Channel, but I've been on an Everest kick lately. It started with Everest: Beyond the Limit, accidentally taped by my oft befuddled TiVo. I was hooked after the climbers on the episode hiked past a dying man, leaving him to expire in the snow. I started reading more about Everest and the debates about ethics on Everest, which led me to Krakauer's book.

In 1996, Krakauer and a few other teams tried to summit Everest and ended up losing almost half of the people who started the climb. The story itself is fascinating and baffling, and I can't even begin to comprehend what would make someone want to climb Everest with the possibility of death being so close. What I like about Krakauer's book, and him as a nonfiction writer, is that he balances so well the need to keep the story moving, and the way he explains background and creates characters. Often in nonfiction I get annoyed because the writer so clunkily rambles on about one or the other, story or narration, but rarely intertwines them in a way that keeps my attention. I think Krakauer strikes a good balance. He keeps my interest with the story, but I also feel like I got to know some of the characters and moral debates he describes.

I actually have liked his books so well I'm thinking of fishing Into the Wild off the shelf for my last minute trip to Minneapolis this weekend. And maybe writing my thoughts about his other books will be penance enough for never having actually read it in college.

Speaking of libraries and reading...

I think Silicon Valley Reads is an amazing idea. Basically, a book is chosen and everyone in the Silicon Valley is encouraged to read it at the same time. The local libraries order tons of copies, and then there are all kinds of live events like book discussions and interviews with the authors. I read last year's pick, When the Emperor Was Divine, but I didn't make it to any of the events. This year's book, The Tortilla Curtain, is on my request list at the library, so hopefully I'll get my hands on it soon.

Though not quite as traumatic as last year's library field trip, this year's library field trip was equally interesting. This year we encountered a cop, having just arrested two teens for getting "too friendly" in the teen center, a couple with a baby on the light rail who appeared to be high and didn't appreciate our kids gawking, and a girl who kept trying to tell me that Leonardo di Caprio was a famous artist and painted things like the Sistine Chapel. Good times.

Superbowl

Despite knowing nothing about football and caring very little about the sport, I did watch the Super Bowl on Sunday. It was a social event. When I called my brother for his birthday Sunday around noon I asked him who was playing, so I didn't arrive at the event totally unknowledgeable.

Here's what the actual game looked like for me: friends and wine kick off blah blah blah glass of wine blah blah blah blah what's a field goal? blah blah blah more wine blah blah blah blah prince has a name again blah blah blah roughing the kicker blah blah more wine blah blah gatorade blah blah trophy blah blah drive home

It was a pretty rad afternoon. And the good thing about the Super Bowl is that no one cares if you talk through it.

jesus trumps all

A friend who teaches second grade told me that her kids have invented a new version of paper, rock, scissors. It's paper, rock, scissors, Jesus. And Jesus beats paper, rock, and scissors.

Still coping....(tear)

Check out this article about Dave and the fire. Though the fire was a tragedy, the article and the video after it are super-cheesy.

There are too many good lines in the article to really pick a favorite, but this is a good one:

"During the winter break, his friends gave him a lot of kitchen supplies in a special way, Schaap said.

“They put on a ‘fire shower’ for me, which was really nice — but there weren’t any games or anything,” he said.

But the creativity didn’t stop there — Schaap even started a wedding registry at Target to list items he needed."

Did you catch that "special way"? :)

How Long Would You Fester?

I think I've been watching too much Six Feet Under lately because I've been thinking about the possible ways I could die. Not really in a morbid, sad sort of way, but more in a practical preventative way. Like if I know about the ways (electrocution, choking, etc.), I might be able to prevent it.

This week I watched an episode where a woman, Emily Previn, chokes and dies alone in her home. She lays there, decaying while covered in ants and other small creatures, for nearly a week before someone finds her. She has no family, no friends, and no one who notices she's gone.

I was discussing with friends last night how long it would take to be found. I'm fairly confident I would be found in 2-3 days, hopefully before the skin starts to just slide off my body. I think that my school would sound the alarm, and my friends would jump in and check it out. But, you have to wonder, how long would you fester before someone would check it out?

"And so, like, well, I left civil engineering for ministry. If you don't know what civil engineering is, don't worry about it. It's boring. So yeah, like, um, I like wanted to get into ministry, full time ministry."

After an already painful display of public speaking (in)ability, our chapel speaker uttered these words, or something very similar, perhaps with more utterances of the word "like." Graciousness in these situations is not my forte, but I was really trying not to nitpick every word or theological difference we had. I couldn't let this go though.

This happened on the same day I first saw that my school was accepting resumes for my job. I had and still have been thinking a lot in the past few weeks about why it feels almost shameful to admit that I'm quitting teaching.

Somehow, teaching seems to give you sort of a badge of character. To say you're a teacher, and to be viewed as one by other people, seems to comment on your moral fiber, for better or worse. And quitting teaching...well, then, you must be backsliding or losing your faith or your nurturing qualities or something.

And now this guy in chapel, this guy who couldn't speak in complete sentences or utter a phrase without repeating like after every word, was telling all of our children that civil engineering should be poo-pooed for "ministry," whatever that means. It pissed me off, for myself and the kids. As I thought about what to do after teaching, I certainly didn't need someone else telling me that I could never do something as important as molding lives, and our kids certainly didn't need anyone telling them the math, English, and science they were studying should be abandoned for ministry.

I just needed to get that ranting off my chest. And in case people are wondering, I have absolutely no idea what I'll do after teaching. Probably rob a bank.

Check it out

I think Ruth's told me about it before, but I just rediscover Lark News, "A good source for Christian news." You have to check out their t-shirts--my favorite is "I want to be a pastor's wife." My 2nd favorite, and probably favorite for middle-school teachers is "Jesus loves you. Then again, he loves everybody."

It works!

Did you know you can call your credit card company and just ask for a lower interest rate? I saw it on Oprah, and thought it would be a big hassle. I tried it though, and in less than a minute Scott was offering me a much lower rate. That's awesome.

Today was Cadet Sunday at church, and therefore time for the annual singing of Living for Jesus. At least it's only once a year.

During the children's sermon today the pastor was using two different cups, one plastic and one handmade out of clay, to illustrate how they bear the mark of their maker. He held up the plastic one and said that it probably wasn't made by hand, but on a machine. Then he held up the ceramic and asked the kids who they thought had made it. Of course many of you who have grown up in Sunday School know what they said...the pastor's kid raised his hand and said "God!" The pastor's response was funny...he said "Well, yes, in a roundabout way."

I'm afraid that every weekend from now until I move I'll think about having to leave my friends. shit.

Giving Notice

This week I told everyone at school that I'm leaving. Boy, did that suck. At the other schools I've left people sort of said stuff like "Wow, we'll miss you. Good luck in whatever you do next!" Or something like that...

At this school, it was different. I'm not sure if that's a sign they really like me, or not. My superintendant was concerned that they had done something to make me leave. A colleague sighed and said "Oh...I thought we made such a good team."

Leaving really has nothing to do with them, but they made me feel guilty. I've never felt like that leaving any other job. Hopefully it's not a sign of things to come.

The Habitation

Here's where ya'll can come and visit me in Sioux Falls--my new home!

The News

It's official. I suppose it has always been official, but until today I've been trying to keep it quiet. Okay...the news is...I'm pregnant.

Just kidding. Though that would have been an interesting message to deliver to my school today, the one that I really told them is that I'm moving to Sioux Falls.

Wow, it's weird to write that. I've been keeping it quiet (quietish?) until now so that my school wouldn't find out through the grapevine, but now that they know, it's out. And I definitely have mixed feelings. I'll miss the Bay Area greatly, along with my friends and my church. But, being close to my family, owning a home, and finding a new job are also exciting.

So yeah. I'm pregnant and I'm moving to Sioux Falls.

My Newest Obsession

I just started watching, and loving, 6 Feet Under. I absolutely love it. And as I watch, I can't stop wondering how the idea of a family in a funeral home came up.

This weekend was great. Amanda was here, and we spent Saturday in San Francisco. The pictures were taken from our hotel room. Miraculously, it was sunny the whole time we were there.

It was great...we took the cable cars, saw the houses from the beginning of Full House (love it), and shopped. Good times.

Too Much Information

I often use the kids and their lives in our sentence examples during grammar class, just to keep it lively and keep them interested. So today I asked for a volunteer. A kid raised his hand, and I asked him to tell us something we didn't know about him, so that I could make a sentence with it.

He looked around for a while, thought, and then said "Um, I wear boxers."

Definitely more than I needed to know.

Funny Kid Moment

Today we were reading "The Call of the Wild" again, and I was trying to help the kids figure out new vocabulary. We came to the word "demonstrative," and I asked the kids to identify the rood word. I thought they would come up with "demonstrate." Not so. A kid raised his hand, and confidently said "Demon!"

Weird!

I was at the grocery store, and I saw a little girl pushing a baby carriage...with a rabbit in it. A real, live rabbit...in the grocery store. I think I actually stopped to stare. I was so surprised I found myself wondering if the rabbit was a service animal. I'm guessing not in a pink and purple baby carriage.

Normal

Things seem to be getting back to normal after the holidays. After a few hours of lugging things up and down from my apartment to storage and back, all of the Christmas decorations have been put away.

Hating the beginning of anything new, it feels good to me to get back to old routines. It was nice to be back at my own church, clean my house, practice viola, and do the boring weekend routines like laundry. Even school is feeling comfortable again, like I know what to do there.

The kids made me laugh this week. The 8th grade is reading "The Call of the Wild." It's interesting to read together, because at points throughout the year, when we're talking about books, I've told the kids how much I hate animal stories. So, when we started this one, they wondered why I liked it, even though it was about dogs. I told them I liked it because most animal stories go like this: an animal endears itself to people, something happens, the animal saves the humans, the animal dies and everyone is sad. The Call of the Wild is definitely NOT a Lassie story.

I was watching the O.C. this week, a guilty pleasure, and the Kaitlin character has to do a speech on the Call of the Wild. It's funny because she ends up saying stuff like "Buck's hair is really pretty" and stuff about how the dogs fighting and killing each other is a lot like being a teenager.

So I asked one of my 8th grade classes if they watch the O.C., and one of the kids said "Oh, you mean that show with no plot?"

Gotta love 'em.

Why Does Hitler Always Show Up?

7th graders have weird minds. Right now in my 7th grade language arts class we're studying drama. We read a play that's actually a Twilight Zone episode, and they're writing new endings which we're going to turn into iMovies.

Last year I let the kids pick a new theme for the ending...only they ended up not really having themes. When I asked what their theme was, they'd say "uh, it's funny." So this year I let them draw from some themes I made up, hoping to spur on more creativity. The groups that were happiest got "We make our own fears come true," and "We only know how to hurt each other." The other groups weren't as happy with "Sometimes we let our imaginations run away with us," and "We're always surprised at how well we can treat each other." I guess they thought the happy ones wouldn't be as much fun...

Today they're working on the scripts in class, and one group was STRUGGLING to come up with something that logically fit together. We started our new endings in the middle of the play we had read, with a dark, shadowy figure walking down the street, and the townspeople picking up a gun. So the group I'm talking to says "Yeah, the figure is an alien, he's shot by the people, and then Hitler comes up to them."

Uh, where did Hitler come from?

I'm realizing that what is logical to me, is definitely not logical to them. And I think logic is genre-specific, and dependent on how much you've read and watched. These kids thought it was totally logical that Hitler would walk into a small town and onto Maple Street. When I told them it wasn't, they just changed Hitler to a homeless man.

Another, more creative group, had their dark shadowy figure turn out to be an alien whose goal was to midgetize the whole planet. I just liked that they made up the word "midgetize." Although, after watching "Little People, Big World," I'm wondering if midgetizing is derogetory. Better than Hitler, I guess.

The Tact of Middle Schoolers

So some of my 8th graders were giggling today. I gave them a quizzical look, and one brave one said "Ms. D, you have a sunglasses tan."

True, true. Unfortunately I do have a line of demarcation at the top of my nose, and no freckles around my eyes. I also have freckles on only half of my forehead because of my bangs.

I noticed it happening too, but couldn't bear to be without my shades. Probably because my future's so bright. :)

Because of middle schoolers, all middle school teachers can be confident they will always instantly know about all flaws--physical, fashion, or otherwise. And we'll know any time we're wearing shoes exactly like those of one of our student's mothers. That really happened last year.

January is Saved!

Amanda is coming to visit. Whoo-hoo!!

January

Christmas vacation was awesome. Hawaii was beautiful, and I'm going through baby withdrawal. Maybe I do have that maternal instinct.

Oh, and I hate January. I love Christmas, and New Year's Eve, even if it means I'm just sitting around, but January is loathsome. I realized recently, while helping struggling readers picture what they're reading in their minds, that I have pictures in my mind for most words, not just stories.

When I think about "January," the picture that comes into my mind is harsh morning light after you've spent all morning cleaning. It's not the great you just got up and get to have a cup of coffee light. In my mind January is like someone pushing you out of your warm bed onto the floor an hour before you really have to get up.

A New Year?

I rang in the new year in the most boring way...doing nothing. After waiting at the baggage carousel for over an hour, I got home from the airport late and spent the minutes between then and midnight opening mail that had accumulated while I've been gone. No alcohol, no noisemakers, no fireworks. Magazines, Christmas cards, and bills instead.

I think long breaks are supposed to leave you refreshed, ready to go back to work. This is not so for me. It's left me with a sense that tomorrow will be only a continuation of the monotonous.

Cuddling with Blaine

Blaine doesn't cuddle often, but once he was in his jammies, he was ready to cuddle with me.

I found out that cuddling with him can be quite violent--he nearly ripped a hunk of hair out.

Finally, he calmed down and I got a kiss from my nephew.

Oahu's North Shore

Rainy Day

Here's what I did yesterday while it was raining on Oahu: took pictures of rainbows, and loved on my nephew. We also went to the North Shore to see the surf, and I'll post pictures later as the internet connection is freaking out. Tomorrow I go home...sad!

Christmas on Oahu

Merry Christmas, everyone! Hawaii is...well, awesome. It's not unusual for me to be away from home on Christmas day, but today was an unorthodox Christmas day for even me.

While most spent Christmas morning opening gifts near the Christmas tree, I spent mine waiting for antibiotics in a Long's drug store, after failing to will away whatever's been making me sick. Then, a few hours on the beach and in the ocean, followed by dinner at Planet Hollywood and then a funnel cake. Top it off with watching some Mythbusters in a hotel room, and that's Christmas.

I even got a gift--the hotel gave me the ornament in the picture. Whoo-hoo!

Aloha from Hawaii!

Baby on the Beach

This trip to Hawaii will be the first time I'll get to hang out with my nephew Blaine on the beach. Every time I think about him hanging out at the beach, I'm reminded of something Anne Lamott wrote. She was writing something about being on the beach near San Quentin, and her description of two babies in the sand was outstanding--she said they were lurching around like 20-pound drug addicts, rolling in the sand until they looked like little breaded veal cutlets.

The description is perfect for Blaine. I've been calling him my little crack baby ever since he was born since he's constantly shaking and waving his hands around like he needs a fix.

The other fun thing about the trip is that Blaine will be wearing this. Hilarious. Back to laundry and packing.

Yesterday I felt horrible with the flu. I didn't want to miss the ballet though, so I still went to the Nutcracker and today I feel all better. It's a Christmas miracle!

Festivities

I was home this weekend for the first Christmas with the babies. It was crazy. Having 2 new babies in a family is sort of like having students in my classroom with ADD. No one can pay attention to any 1 thing for any length of time. And the toys...I have made it my mission as an aunt to buy the noisest toys possible, along with any types of embarassing outfits.

This Christmas however, I knitted for the babies. I forgot to take pictures when I was finished, but there were blankets for both babies. I also got to hang out with Dave which was a lot of fun, especially registering at Target. Oh, and Inca! I hadn't eaten at Inca for a very long time, and it was well overdue.

Now I'm back in CA, getting ready to go to Hawaii. Actually, today I'm still trying to get over the flu I got this week on my way back from IA. Then this weekend it's off to the islands. It seems like everyone is going there this Christmas, maybe I'll see some of ya'll.

Now it's off to the fabulous library to stock up on books. And just maybe I'll finish Anna Karenina.

No snow???

First, a seventh grade moment of brilliance. Some boys decided it would be a good idea to steal matches from the school office, burn another student's sweatshirt, and then lie about it to the principal in front of the 43 other seventh-graders, of whom probably 90% actually saw it happen. Boys and their fires...

So I'm home, navigating the family holiday maze, and I'm thoroughly disappointed that there is no snow. There is a weak promise of snow today, but I'm not counting on it. I'll blame global warming, and the poor judgement of 7th graders.

Civic Duty Complete!

So only about an hour after my post about civic duty, I was called in to jury duty. I was excited about it in the same way I get excited about voting--such an interesting process. It was a lot of waiting, during which I met a dental hygienist student who said she tried to get off jury duty by saying she doesn't believe in judging people. weak.

She didn't get to go. So after the waiting we went into the court room and the judge was great. She took the time to explain things, even the history, and according to her, privelege of doing jury duty. She said that up until the late 70s women weren't guaranteed the right to serve on a jury.

Somehow my number was called in the first group to be questioned. I got dismissed ono a hardship, since I have a trip planned starting this weekend. Though I was happy not to have to miss the trip, I was a little disappointed to leave the process so early. I think the strangest thing about it though was that when asked about a hardship I had to explain myself in a microphone, to the judge, in front of 60 strangers.

My Civic Duty

This is the first time in my 9 years of being a legally-registered voter that I have been assigned jury duty. I'm more than happy to do my civic duty, but I have to say that being a teacher on jury duty sucks. Each night I can check directions for the next day, but not until after 5pm. That means that before I leave school I have to have a plan in place in case I won't be there the next day--extra "emergency" plans in case the sub. can't actually teach English, etc. Probably an extra 1/2-1 hour of work each day. Then, when I check the website, I may have to call back between 11am-12 the next day, during the school day. If I get called in, I may have to quick whip up some plans for a sub for that same afternoon. Oh, and I have to call the poor woman who arranges subs every night to let her know my status. Friday we're going on a field trip and I have to arrange extra drivers in case I'm stuck in a court room instead of ice-skating. What a lot of work!

Thanksgiving

Most of you posted about your Thanksgivings a while ago now. It took me a while to process mine. I had many, many things to be thankful for. My eagle nephew wore an outfit with a bowtie for a picture, and his cheeks are so big they hung down and covered the bowtie. I also got to pick out a Christmas tree with Ang and her little cousins (or were they nieces and nephews?) and unborn baby KV. The little people in her family all wanted to take home part of the stump of the Christmas tree, which was cute.

I also had friends and family to be thankful for. Without getting into too much grotesque (and that word SO applies to my family) detail, there was much strife. I was thankful to fly back home and leave it all after the few days I was there.

Usually, I like airports because they're an emotional no man's land. While I'm there I don't feel attached to either where I'm going or where I came from, or anyone in the airport for that matter. It's nice. Until this trip. If you're familiar with the Minneapolis airport, there are what seem like miles-long stretches of moving walkways, particularly between concourses A and C. I was walking down one, enjoying anonymity, trying to figure out what had gone on while I was home when my senses were assaulted by figures in green velvet. I have never seen it before, and never since, but it was a group of Christmas carolers, riding the moving walkway in the opposite direction. There was no where to go, and nothing to do but look at them, with their smiling, singing faces as they rode by. They made me angry.

So, the good and bad, I guess that's Thanksgiving. Or maybe just the facts of life...the facts of life. you take the good, you take the bad, you take them all and there you have the facts of life, the facts of life.

Tongue in Cheek

Congratulations to Dave, who after a devestating apartment fire in which he lost everything, has just announced his engagement to Zooey Deschanel, and subsequent Target registry.

But seriously, check out the registry. And Zooey Deschanel. She's hot.

The Right Image?

The speaker at our teacher's convention the past few days was quite compelling. He did use one metaphor I can't quite get out of my head. He said that we as teachers should reflect Christ so that when "students rub up against us they smell Jesus." Eeeewwwww.

Speaking of children, I get to babysit the nearly-named-after-an-eagle nephew next week when I'm home. whoo-hooo!

Worth the chance?

It's teaching days like today when having kids seems a lot like playing Russian roulette. There are the kids about whom I think "That is the sweetest, kindest child I've ever seen." Then there are the ones who I swear I will never, ever, in a million years, name any child after. How do people get pregnant when you have no idea what you're going to get?

Back Off!

I love shopping. I admit it, fully and openly. What I do not love is the zealots that run the mall kiosks. I've tried being nice, but it gets me nowhere. They don't take no for an answer, though I've told them endless times I'm not interested in pink straightening irons, bulghur-filled neck pillows, or (gasp!) moving printed beach scenes in a lamp/picture/keychain.

So last night I'm in the mall, trying to finish Christmas shopping so I don't have to go anywhere near the slow-walking crowds who will soon descend. I'm walking past a kiosk. Now, when I walk past kiosk, I make some deliberate "Don't talk to me!" moves and use as much body language as possible. First, I look at the person in the eyes, look down, and purposefully break eye contact. Next I visibly veer off my path toward the edge of the mall, away from the shady gift-monger. Appearantly this is not enough.

Despite my dodging the guy last night verbally accosted me: "Ma'am, can I ask you a small question?" Instead of self-proclaimed witty banter of how many letters are included in a small question, I said forcefully "No." Still, he did not relent. And this almost made me laugh out loud. He said "Ohhh" like he was sad. "It's a really good one."

Now, what might be a really good question from a man standing in front of a kiosk selling pink and white zebra-printed straightening irons? I guess I'll never know. I kept walking.

Cats + Stuff

Cats with Stuff on Them is capital "H" Hilarious! Thanks Panda!

Those Good Iowans

I was watching Extreme Makeover: Home Edition tonight, and was reminded of an episode a few weeks ago. The family was from Iowa, and had moved from the city out to the farm because they thought it would help their kids to grow up "right." The reason they got a home makeover was that they had a fire and their house burnt down.

They built them a beautiful house, had a few sentimental moments, and the obligatory Iowa activity--a combine derby. Even having been a trophy girl at a tractor pull this summer, I didn't know combine derbys existed until a fellow Iowan at school told me.

Anyway, after the house was built the Extreme Makeover team kept talking about how friendly and caring the Iowans were, helping with construction, moving furniture, etc. And I couldn't disagree more.

The episode came up in the teacher's lounge the next day, and I was surprised that we all agreed--this shouldn't have happened. In the towns where we grew up, no one would have let someone's house burn down without rebuilding it. A good neighbor and a good small town pulls together to get families through those times. There are soup suppers and pancake breakfasts and change cans at Walmart to help raise money. People give money for their school tuition and donate clothing.

Elections: Whoo-hoo!

I love election day! California's proposition makes me feel like I'm really participating in democracy, though it's not quite as hopeful when you realize all the stupid people participate too. Regardless, my usual cynicism about politics seems to take a back seat to the actual process on election day. Too bad they don't give out the "I voted!" stickers to people who vote absentee.

I put up my Christmas tree tonight. Yep, skipped straight from Halloween to Christmas. Being gone for Thanksgiving though makes me feel like that's okay. There's that, and the fact that I do not own any cornucopia decorations.

I do, however, own a Christmas tree. It's one of the easy ones, already strung with lights. Managing to drag it up from the basement storage was not easy, but definitely worth it. I didn't put it up last year, so it was a surprise to open the boxes with the decorations.

I'd forgotten how many ornaments I have, and I thought I would never be taken with a sentimental, schmaltzy attachment to decorations, but I was wrong. The tree skirt my grandmother gave me and the disco ball ornaments I brought to Haiti brought back the fondest memories.

My grandmother has made stockings and tree skirts for my family as long as I can remember. She embroiders all the sequins and stitching on them, and personalizes each one with a name. Right now there are four generations in my family who all have stockings and tree skirts made by her.

The disco balls are great because they remind me of our Haitian Christmas tree: a dead tree, painted white, cemented into a paint can. I'm confident that Charity is decorating hers as I write. Anyway, the disco balls have lasted from that sad little Charlie Brown tree all the way to my grown up, already lit tree. Yea for them!

Happy Belated Halloween!

Happy belated Halloween everyone! Last year I said Reformation Day because I planned the R-day celebration at school. This year we took a field trip to a science museum. I liked Martin Luther better, personally.

And a huge THANKS! to Dave for the fabulous costume idea. Though my embroidery skills are obviously not as stellar as Hester's, it won me third place at a Halloween party last night. I think it could have been higher if the other party-goers knew who Hester Prynne was and why I was carrying a Cabbage Patch Kid around. Then again, I didn't know who the one-armed drummer from Def Leppard was. Oh well. I did win orange hot chocolate, so that makes up for it. Thanks for that, Chef Mayhem!

For Charity, and anyone else who finds it funny

I was watching the TLC show "The Monastery" yesterday, and one of the participants made this comment:

The only person who would break in through a skylight and steal beer from monks is either an alcoholic...or a marine.

I need some help: Is it insulting to give the children's book The Ugly Duckling as a baby shower gift?

The Need for Hobbies

At some point last school year I decided I needed to get some hobbies. The nature of teaching is that you are never finished with anything, and I was finding that incredibly frustrating. I just wanted something to be able to hold up and say "I'm finished!"

So, I took up the viola and started knitting again. Both are going better than I expected them to. I'm about halfway through the first Suzuki book for viola, and here are some of my latest knitting projects:
This is a baby blanket I'm knitting for one of my nephews. I started it in August, when I was sick at my parents' lake house. Each square probably took about 4-5 hours worth of knitting, maybe more at the beginning when I wasn't as quick.

After this photograph I wove in all the ends you see hanging out at the edges of the squares.

The next step, which I've just started on is to sew the squares together with yarn and a plastic yarn needle--quite tedious in my opinion. But after that, it's finished!

My next project is a technicolor cell phone cozy. I know it doesn't look like a cell phone cozy quite yet, but it will be. It'll have some fancy shmancy finishing touches like velcro and a button to accent the green and fuschia.

So, friends and family, I hope you all like knitted goodies. I'm thinking that I may knit some or all of my Christmas presents this year. I saw a pattern tonight at a bookstore for a beer bottle cozy. What could be better than a knitted beer bottle cozy?

Strangest sign I've seen today: Bruce Lee Hair Salon

Hint: If you are going to have high school kids do Shakespeare, do not ask them to speak old English with a Scottish brogue. It doesn't work, as was proven by today's field trip.

The happenings

So one of the little munchkins gave me a present last week--cold germs. Getting sick on a Friday afternoon is just about as disappointing as getting an oatmeal raisin cookie when you're expecting peanut butter chocolate chip.

I was just pissed off enough about being sick to still go to Donna's Sat. night for dinner. Calling it "dinner" at Donna's house just somehow seems inadequate...it's really more of an event...an affair, perhaps. Yummy, whatever you call it.

So I went out, giving the sickness the middle finger, and then felt worse on Sunday. Silly me. So I decided to stay home from school today. One of the sucky things about being a teacher is that being sick is more work than being at school. So I spent time yesterday working on sub plans, and then decided at noon today that it was just better to go in and make sure things got done right.

Anyway, boring what's going on kind of stuff. And, the most exciting news of all--check out Angela's blog!

You're joking, right?

Today in class one of my eighth grade students had one of those dollar coins with Sacajawea on it. Appearantly, she's not big with eighth-graders. Here's how our conversation went:

Student 1: Hey, Ms. D, who is the woman with the baby?
Me: Uh, you mean Sacajawea?
S1: Yeah, the lady with the baby.
S2: Wait, isn't she the first woman to vote?
Me: NO! She was not the first woman to vote.
S3: (Laughing) Ha! The first woman to vote...duh, Sacajawea was the lady who wouldn't get out of the back of the bus.
Me: (while banging my head on the chalkboard) Okay. First, Sacajawea is not the lady on the back of the bus, and second, Rosa Parks did not sit in the BACK of the bus.

Then, after school one of the kids was asking about my Halloween costume. I said it's a character from the Scarlett Letter, and she asked "Oh, is that a Nancy Drew book?"

Sheesh.

Middle School Love: If Only It Stayed This Easy

Sappily sweet and funny, this is a note I confiscated this week, from a 7th grade boy to the love of his life:

Whatever N says 2 U is not true. I love U, and I care about U! I'm not using U 2 Kiss U and then dump U!! And I'm not going to dump U don't worry. N is just being a jerk, I don't Know why he would say that about U. So don't listen to anything he says. I really do love U and care about U. OH and here is a picture of me I might get my picture retaken so if I do I'll give U another. I still want 2 kiss U. How about tomorrow behind the tree in the corner, eather one. OH, and A said that N was saying that stuff because he likes U. But I don't know if that is true or not.

LOVE,
S

Some days, in the midst of psychotic family drama and kids thinking it's a good idea to lift one another on to the roof to get a football down, there is a student who gives you hope. Today an 8th grade girl came in and said that after studying Romeo and Juliet in school last week, she and her friend watched the movie 8 times over the weekend. I was so happy to hear that because the week before, when I mentioned how interesting it is to think of Shakespeare in modern times, she said she had started to watch the movie, but hadn't understood it. Hooray for kids who learn things.

The theme of today's parent meeting:

All Families Are Psychotic

school, school, school

My time is being consumed by school. We've had 2-3 parent meetings per week after school, both helpful and destructive. The one night I didn't have anything this week I went to a party with some colleagues and talked about school. This weekend there's a school event, and I'm babysitting kids from school.

What do people who have normal jobs do with their time?

I am craving snow.

Alas, there is no snow in the forecast for the Bay Area.

Now appearing on Oprah and South Park

I admit it...I love South Park. And every now and then there's an episode so outrageous, a story so ridiculous, that it can't possibly be true. I figure they must be using some incredibly fabricated plot to poke fun of a truth that's a little less ridiculous.

Then, days or months later I find out that the plot actually IS true.

This has happened to me at least three times so far: an episode about Christian scientists, an episode about the foundations of Mormonism, and most recently....an episode about NAMBLA.

Couldn't be real you say? There couldn't possibly be something out there called the North American Man/Boy Love Association. Not so. Not only is it on South Park, today it's also on Oprah.

This is so much fun!

Teaching Sucks Sometimes

This week, and I know it's only Tuesday, has made me want to quit teaching very badly. I woke up in a good mood yesterday, but the day just went downhill. First, a parent who wants me to figure out why her daughter doesn't have friends, and to help her make friends. Okay...manageable though not really what I want to do. Then, yesterday after school a mother yelled at me.

Not a discussion, or rational talking, but YELLING. And in front of other people on the parking lot. Over something ridiculous. I don't mind parents disagreeing with me or asking me about why I choose to do what I do. But this was nothing like that. She was just M-E-A-N.

I need a mental health day and soon. It's only September... The bright light in all of this is that the Gilmore Girls' premier is tonight. Whee.

Camping

The camping is over for another year! Yea!

It actually wasn't that bad. The worst part was sleeping on a barely there mattress thrown over a hunk of wood. The cool night air was actually nice. I told the kids I think there is nothing better than being cozy warm in bed with the air all cool around you. I also let them know they are the only people I go camping for, and only once a year.

In terms of the actual activities of the trip, the zip line and "flying squirrel" were the most fun. I was nervous about both because I'm afraid of heights, but I couldn't not do them in front of the kids. The flying squirrel is this cable that's attached to a pulley high in the trees. A person is harnessed to the cable on one end, and a bunch of people pull the cable on the other end to hoist the person high in the air. The kids decided to run super fast so that I shot up into the air very quickly. Well done, 7th graders.

I also learned "what's going on" in the 7th grade. My cabin wanted to talk about....what else? The boys. They were shocked to learn that I have some vague ideas of what goes on their social lives. They went around the next day saying "Watch out...Miss D knows everything about us." Rock on.

We're going camping now, we're on our way...

Does anyone remember that song from Psalty? The big blue songbook and the kids go on a camping trip...there's a little girl who gets lost from the group and sings "I cast all my cares upon you."

Well, I'm going camping. Not exactly by my choice, but rather with my middle schoolers. This weekend is our "spiritual retreat." I did not name it that. Last year we California camped, in cabins with bathrooms and electricity. This year it's tent cabins for us...cabins sans real doors and windows, only canvas coverings. Have I mentioned I don't really love nature?

I love walking around in nature. Looking at bugs, trees, and caves even. Hiking? Nope. Going to the bathroom far away from where I'm sleeping? Nope. And if I'm going to go without electricity I want it to be somewhere tropical.

So I'm curious to see how this all will go. If it gets awful I'll teach the kids the Psalty songs and make them sing. Somehow I don't think they'll get the humor in it though. This class is strange that way. My colleague Becky and I have talked about it, and they just don't "get us." The other day I was telling a story about getting sick on a plane, and at a part where kids usually laugh, they didn't. So I said "Wow, you guys never smile or laugh, what's up?"

And one kid raised his hand, and with a straight face said "Miss De? We don't think puke is funny."

Okay then...

Today the same kid was fishing a "cool bottle" out from behind the neighbor's fence, bordering the playground. It turned out to be a Bombay Sapphire bottle, though I didn't share that with him. I asked the rest of the kids if they were putting anything OVER the fence, since the neighbors often call the school and complain. They said no....and looked guilty. I asked again, and one kid said:

"Um, well, just some poo."
Me: What? Poo? You threw poo over the fence?
Another kid: No, we didn't throw it. He had a pretzel and he dipped it in and threw it over

Well, now that's much better, isn't it?

Another Reason to Love the Grey Psalter Hymnal

It seems silly to be sad about it, but today was my nephew's baptism. I had wanted to be home with my family for it, but it didn't work out for various reasons. I thought about the baptism briefly when I woke up, but I wasn't going to dwell on it.

Browsing through the bulletin at church, I realized that there was a baptism scheduled this morning. It was the child of a German couple who are studying here, who had no family with them to witness the baptism. And as we read the form for baptism out of the grey psalter, I realized that although my family is far away, as is the family of the child baptised here, we were reading exactly the same form for baptism and making the same promises here and there.

I think that's what I love about tradition and churches with history--you are always liturgically connected. It made me feel a little better about missing my nephew's baptism.

Poo

The show is off....someone in it had a family emergency and this weekend's performances have been cancelled. That means no Amanda and Jason. Rats!

It did cheer me up though that tonight, while having dinner at the pastor's house, his son said goodbye to me by saying "Bye, Brandon!!!" I guess it's his middle name and is close enough to mine to pass...

Funny

A girl in my class asked me today how she should write an answer to a question. She said "Miss D, should we write it in a complete sentence, or can we use bulletin points?"

Jason Comes to My Town

This weekend was so much fun! It's been forever since I've seen Jason, and he happened to be in the neighborhood and came to visit.

Not only did he grill and drink Sofia Coppola's wine from a pink can as evidenced by the pictures, he also talked to my kids at school, and learned about where to buy real clavicles in the Bay Area.

The school thing was a riot. The kids absolutely loved him. He talked about how he uses reading and writing as an actor, and they asked questions....lots of questions. I think they knew that if they asked questions we wouldn't have to do anything else in class.

I was surprised at some of the really great questions they asked, like how he becomes inspired for a role, what director he'd like to work with, etc.

They also asked him to sing and act, which was great. He
did a Shakespeare monolgue for them, and sang a bit from Kiss Me Kate. Probably the best part of his visit was when they asked for his autograph. One girl had been folding a paper fan during his talk, and she asked him to sign her fan so that she could sell it on Ebay if he becomes famous. He said "If?" and she replied "Well, yeah....you know...." all practical and all. Another girl had him sign her vocabulary worksheet. What could be cuter than that?

Next weekend: Amanda and Jason, whoo-hoo!!!!!

School has been exhausting. This week has been full of drama, unfit for posting publicly. Suffice it to say seventh graders don't always consider the consequences of their actions. Or rarely. Maybe never.

I have collected a few funny kid stories so far this year. First, a conversation taking place outside my room. The kids are two fifth grade boys.

Kid A: Hey, man, in 5th grade everyone gets girlfriends!
Kid B: Girlfriends? No way! All they do is take all your allowance.
A: No they don't. Not that much...maybe 2 dollars a week.
B: Two dollars? I only get five! It's not worth it.
A: But everyone has one. I bet you can't get one in a month.
B: A month? You only start to make a friend in a month. I just met you three weeks ago and we're barely friends.

I tried to laugh quietly so they wouldn't get embarrased.

This morning I saw kid B again...to preface this story, our school has outdoor hallways. Each hallway has an overhang held up by poles. So I'm walking to my room, and Kid B is with another fifth grade boy by one of the poles. He's putting his left foot right next to the pole, so that the outside of his leg and foot are touching it. Then, he puts his right foot in front of that one, and grabs onto the pole. As I walk by I hear him say "And that's how you do a sit spin. You just grab onto the pole and do that."

I'm not sure if he was actually trying to teach the other kid pole dancing, but I was laughing so hard I couldn't have asked him if I wanted to.

I've wanted to see the movie Hardcore for a long time, but for one reason or another never got to it. When I was in college I saw the writer/director, Paul Schrader, speak at a Faith and Writing Conference. He was interesting to listen to because he was born into the CRC in Grand Rapids, and ended up leaving.

In the movie, Jake Van Dorn is looking for his daughter who has run away from a Young Calvinist convention to work in the porn industry. Along the way he meets a stripper who helps him look for his daughter. A lot happens, but what I really thought was funny/poignant/interesting was this: Jake and the girl are sitting in the airport, waiting for a flight. They start discussing beliefs, and he explains TULIP (major tenets of Calvinism) to her. Her reaction? No wonder you're so fucked up. Brilliant.

Does It Make You Chuckle?

So Dave and I have been having a conversation lately about what's funny, and if it's different for men and women. Mostly, it comes up because there are certain things I just do NOT think are funny, but most guys do. Like The Big Lebowski (or any other Coen brothers movie, really), and Monty Python, and Mr. Show.

We both like Ali G, but different parts, and for different reasons. So we've been talking, and I've been thinking about what gender has to do with humor. Some other friends hypothesize that women like humor where they can relate to the situation, and guys like more detached, absurd or physical humor.

I'm not sure though...I'd love to hear what other people think. And is there anything out there that most women find funny that men don't?

First Happy Child Moment of the New Year

This morning two of my now eighth grade girls came in and said they had a present for me. I was a little surprised, but thought it would be fun. It turns out they finished a story they had started writing with another friend during seventh grade, last year. They must've finished it over the summer, photocopied it, and gave me their first copy. They told me not to read the last page until I was finished with the whole book, but I couldn't stop myself. It was so cute! They thanked me for taking away their first book during class last year because it gave them ideas for this one, and thanked me for my "support" and help. How sweet! Oh, and when they become published and make gads of money they promised to remember me.

Jetta Report

As a Jetta owner, I find the Jetta Report really interesting. And darn good marketing.

Uh, Really?

Here's some text I found in a news article about Pluto's demotion to "dwarf planet":

"The shift will have the world's teachers scrambling to alter lesson plans just as schools open for the fall term."

Give us some credit. As a middle school teacher, counting out eight planets instead of nine does not top my list of current crises. The girl whose lace bra is on display? There's a crisis.

Bulletin Board

Here are some pictures of my bulletin board. The one on the left is a close-up of one of the postcards--this one is the immaculate coneption. The flash got a little weird. The blob in the upper left hand corner of the bulletin board actually says "What's your story?"

hip, hip, hooray!

The first day of school was a smashing success. My homeroom is fun, and they laughed at my jokes. No funny kid stories yet, but I'm celebrating the day with some great pinot grigio. Whoo-hoo!

First Day!

Tomorrow is our first day of school, ahhhh! No, actually, I'm feeling quite ready. The difference between last year and this year is amazing. It really helps seeing friendly faces around, and knowing some of the parents. My homeroom parents seem overwhelmingly supportive. I even had a few offer to grade things and help out. There is one psycho mom who will send me to an early grave, but overall I'm impressed.

I've never been a bulletin board person, but I'll have to post pictures of one I made this year. I guess "made" might be a little strong. I was at the Christian bookstore (yes, again there were crazies there, raving against the American Girls books carried there) and I found a book of the "postmodern Bible." It's a series of postcards by different artists and their interpretations of different stories in the Bible. They turned into a very fun bulletin board--not too cheesy, but colorful and intriguing, in my humble opinion.

I also completed a task today that was supposed to be finished before school started LAST year--I got a TB test. Seeing as how the clinic is about 300 feet from my apartment, I should have had it done a long time ago. I guess late is better than never though, at least when it comes to TB.

Score!

Finding devotional books for my middle schoolers is difficult. Either they're too childish (Does your brother or sister ever say mean things?), or they're way too mature (Maybe your friend has been raped). I have one book that I really like, Devotions by Dead People: Secrets from Beyond the Grave. Kids like it because it's kind of quirky, with little epitaphs after each devotional. I also like it because it goes a little deeper into the lives of the "dead people."

Today I found another score--Taming a Liger: Unexpected Spiritual Lessons from Napoleon Dynamite. The kids at our school LOVE Napoleon Dynamite. It doesn't matter that the movie is now getting old, they love it. There's a kid who looks just like Pedro. So yeah, score.

Children at Church are Funny

Church today was pretty funny. The children's message was about the Tower of Babel, and the kids were great. The person leading the message asked the kids if they could explain what happened at the tower. One kid raised her hand, and gave a very succinct, accurate answer. Once she was done, the adult leading it moved on. However, a very persistent kid kept his hand in the air. The leader finally called on him, and the kid said "Um, Jesus went on the cross!"

Then, after church, I was chatting with some people outside. I was catching up with one woman when her granddaughter walked up to us. I said hello, but the kid wouldn't reply. So I said "oh, she's being shy." Her grandmother said no, no way, she's not shy. She tried to get her to say hi, but the girl only stared at me. And kept staring. Her grandmother asked her a question, but the girl just kept staring. It was starting to get weird. The others standing there said she was entranced...weird.

Nellie's daughter also acted like she's never seen me before.

Lesson learned? I scare children. Strange.

Oh, So Your Kid Is Special Too?

Here is the most difficult part of my job for me: the parents.

Tonight a new student and her mom stopped by my room, while I was on my cell phone ordering takeout for dinner. The girl really didn't say anything, but the mom told me her daughter is very advanced in lang. arts, and is reading at a college level. In the seventh grade...

So she wants me to make special assignments for her, of course. This makes me really nervous at the first meeting because I'm pretty sure I'll never be able to satisfy this mom. She said her daughter reads 4-7 books per week, and that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree...At least I know what I'm getting into I guess.

I know that as a teacher you're not supposed to take stuff so personally, but I can't help it. It's so hard to try to be exactly what each parent wants. Ugh.

Size Comparison

3 weeks versus 4 months

He's surprised to find out he has a cousin!

The Apocalypse Is Near

Dave moved to OK and has internet at home, a cell phone, and (gasp!) text messaging.

And I've started running. Slowly. And not very far. Yet.

Welcome Home

I'm back. I was welcomed home by a flooded bathroom this morning at 5am. For a while now there's been a tiny little bit of water that leaks from the toilet tank. I've opened it up a few times, and when I do that, and flush the toilet at the same time, a geyser of water comes from the top of the tank. I suppose most normal people would have called maintenance a long time ago, but I always just repositioned the lid so that the leaking stopped.

This morning, it didn't stop. What a warm welcome home. Now I'm nervous to go down to the parking garage for fear my car windows have been smashed and/or my car won't start because rodents have once again invaded.

I've been...

Earlier this week a friend wrote and asked if everything was okay, since I haven't posted in a while. Yes, things are fine. Mostly I haven't posted because I've been at my parents' lake house with only a dial-up connection. We spent the week because my dad loves the Okoboji Bible Conference. It's not really my thing, but a week at the lake is always fun.

I also took a trip up to Minnesota for Heather's wedding. She and her husband got married outside, under a gorgeous grove of trees. It also happened to take place near a corn field, so we took a group photo.Donna and I drove up to the wedding together, and spent some time hanging out with everyone. We met Megan's kids, Cristina's husband, and Kristin's Italian fiance.

Perhaps the most exciting part of the MN trip was that we went with Megan to a county fair and a tractor pull. I think I've been to a tractor pull long, long ago, but I didn't remember how crazy it was.Not only did we get to watch the tractor pull, but we actually handed out the trophies. I guess Megan's family has been doing it for years, so we helped her hand out trophies with tractors and pickups on the tops. It was actually a lot of fun!

Tomorrow I head home. Donna and I actually both fly back tomorrow, but 12 hours apart. We've talked about leaving notes or other items in the airports, but I'm sure that would be frowned upon in the current situation.

tee hee

Tonight we went to the golf course for dinner and listed on the menu was a "breaded tenderlion sandwich." My sister-in-law had it and said it was quite good.