My mind has been consumed with the future since I've been back home. Actually, the confusion is mostly about where home is. I can't stop thinking about whether to stay in CA, or move back home. CA has fabulous weather, attractions, and friends, while home has my family, 2 babies, and the possibility of nesting.
I've signed contracts for this coming school year, but past that, I'm at a loss. And I sincerely wish I could stop thinking about it. It's frustrating to want to have a concrete, foolproof plan in place 12 months in advance.
And about nesting...I think it may be one of those female things. For me, it means that I really want to own a home, and take care of it and improve it. I think it may be a precursor to wanting babies someday, but I'm definitely not there yet. Every time I think about nesting, I have this picture in my mind of a giant, light blue bird settling herself in the middle of a living room. She kind of just plops herself down in the middle of the floor, flaps her wings a few times like she's shaking off dust, and then hunkers down like she's protecting the whole room. How strange.
Do men ever want to nest?
3 comments:
It's funny that you ask that, because I had just told John last week that he's a good nester. Since we found out we're not going overseas anytime soon, he's been in nesting mode.
Yes, men nest. Although I don't think they would use that term. Maybe you're refering to decorating more, rather than something more typically male i.e. installing a sink or something.
I don't know about you coming back. I can't say that you shouldn't, but I sincerely think after a year here you would go crazy. I've said this many times but it bears repeating: this area is geared entirely around families, and to a lesser extent, couples. Although if you buy a house, that will suck a lot of your time as well. And you don't have any friends at home anymore. And it's freakin' difficult to make friends around here, partially because of the family thing, partially because it's hard to meet people that are going to have the same interests as you. Anyone close to my age at Covenant (besides Josh/Sara) is married and has a child. I'm not exaggerating.
Maybe that's all Ok with you. It bothers me though.
And babies quickly become old hat when they're not yours.
I'm not trying to be a dick, but I don't want you to have any illusions. You may just have a pleasent conception of home because its nice to be back for a little while. I hope you're not offended by that.
Dave, I hear what you're saying, although you're right that some of that stuff is okay with me. It's about trade-offs. I lived in NC for a year without any friends, family, church, or job that I liked. It sucked. Now I have friends, stuff to do, a church, but my family is far away. And honestly, there is something good about feeling like you're at home. Not just a short-lived being at home, but for me I just feel at peace when I'm there.
I'm not sure if it's connected, but I talked to Dr. Dengler at church when I was home, and she said that when she moved she was told that there were honest people at home, without some of the pretense there is in CA. I see that.
So somewhere between your less than glowing review (realism, whatever) and my optimism is a balance.
I'm not making any decisions right now, I've got a whole year to figure it out.
So yes, I hear your warning. Hope that doesn't sound bitchy, but I think we have different perspectives.
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